Babes In Armor

Life is good. Daddy is Governor of Florida and I’m an out-of-control nymphomaniacal lush.

The American League of Gun Owners is about to give me their Second Amendment Award because I shot a guy who was trying to take my virginity.

Umm hmm, right.

The problem is, the guy I didn’t shoot is now on Death Row for a murder I can prove he didn’t commit. Did I mention he’s kinda cute?

The drug-addicted, over-the-hill ham actor who’s giving me the award has a grandson who’s trying to get in my pants.

Which is sorta weird ’cause he’s gay.

Did I mention the cable news channel that’s going to show the electrocution on live TV?

Did I mention the TV tribute to the dead eight-year-old beauty queen? Or the fixed-bayonet drill team?

Did I mention the beheading? The torture? The electrocution?

The two (count ’em, two) North Dakota death-cult shootouts?

Did I mention this is a musical? With songs by Rodgers and Hart?

(PLEASE NOTE: Republicans, anti-abortionists, supply-siders, and anyone who thinks George W. Bush is the elected President of the United States, might just as well forget about this script entirely. Have a nice day.)

BABES IN ARMOR — THE UNORIGINAL CAST ALBUM

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